These recent days were dark times. In those gloomy hours the world seemed to spin by in a blur while we sat, immobilized by thought, entrapped by incalculable equations and unequal calculations. Food was spurned, games unplayed, books unread, even sleep was sacrificed and the juxtaposition of the words "free" and "time" had long lost all meaning. But arise now form your squalor my people! Lament no more! Rejoice, ye physicsfolk, for homeworks of all varieties lie vanquished at our feet! Our labors were not in vain, we have gained courage, we have gained valor, we have gained understanding. Exalt in joyous cry and let the feasting and revelry commence! Know too that our finest hour yet awaits us, and that this was merely the beginning.

*Let not that first tangle of words concern you overly much. Sometimes the sweet spice of victory is needed to season a particularly bland day.

I decided yesterday that it would be really fun to teach a class on graph theory. I ponder how this can be accomplished even now.

Since I really want to sleep for an appreciable amount of time tonight, I will cut to the chase...the car chase. For I now present Dick Dastardly!

A villain whose upper lip houses more conniving and deviousness than most criminals ever dare aspire to, Dick Dastardly is the driver of the Mean Machine in the excellent cartoon Wacky Races. Dastardly's only strategy in the races to cheat, cheat, cheat! The more overly complicated the ploy, the better. Unfortunately for our villain, the show attempted to teach kids good morals, so all his treachery was for naught, either proving totally ineffective or more often than not backfiring completely. Of course, Dastardly's main failing was his lack of savvy...his dearth of cunning...his...alright, he was pretty much an idiot. Despite frequently blasting ahead of the other racers, certain to achieve victory, he would invariably stop and spend minutes setting up ludicrously elaborates traps. Despite being the only racer never to win, place or even show, Dastardly villainous ways were still the highlight of this classic cartoon.